For years I have put off my writing because I felt it just wasn't good enough. I thought no one would ever read my thoughts or what's in my heart so I just gave up...well actually I just didn't give much attention to the gift that was given to me so long ago.
Why do we fear the unexpected? Is it because we can't control what is on the other side of the unknown? Is it because we simply don't believe in ourselves enough to push through the doubts and adversity? Or is it because deep down we know that stepping out on faith in order to walk into our destiny is by far the hardest and scariest thing we have ever had to do? For me, it's been all of the above.
See, I knew a long time ago that I had a unique gift with words and expression. I knew that my words had power at a very young age, even when the enemy tried to shut my voice down and even tried to evoke fear into my spirit by making me think that no one would ever listen or believe me. As I grew up I still had an issue with being verbally understood and it seemed that I was more comfortable sharing my heart on pen and paper and it was more receptive then my verbal attempts to communicate with people. So...I began to write. I wrote letters to my friends, my parents and my grandparents on the things I had seen, felt, endured, etc. and how those individuals in my life at the time drastically contributed to those feelings. I wrote in multiple journals to God about the various things I encountered and how to deal with those things His way and not my own. I began writing on social media platforms as a way to share my thoughts and the wisdom that was exploding out of me. I did all of these things and the more comfortable I became the more hell broke loose around me and I stopped. Point blank!
There are no excuses for pushing what I absolutely love to do to the side and leaving the gift I was given on a shelf to rot. I may never be able to reach millions of people with my verbal communication, but I can with my written communication. I was recently reminded on a conference call that it is selfish of me not to share what's inside of me because I have no clue the people who need to read what I have to say. Talk about a slap back into reality. The speaker was correct and for the first time in a long time I was reminded about why I was put on this earth and my contribution to the world. I was reminded that by harboring my thoughts and my gift I was doing a disservice to the One who blessed me with such a tremendous gift and that thought along was unbearable. This was a very tough pill to swallow, but I had to own my mess and clean it up.
It has been over a year since I have written on this blog but I promise you it will not be the last. I can no longer make excuses for myself or procrastinate any further about the things I must share with millions around the world. Thank you to those who believed in me and to those who doubted me. Thank you to those who have prayed with me and to those who have spoken life back into a dead situation. Thank you for your love and support.
Miss Natalie is back!
Tha Non-Fiction Version
- Miss Natalie
- This is a way of escape to express myself to an audience without a capacity. This is my life, my strengths, my weakness, my fears, my hopes, my doubts, my everything. An Outlet of Relief!
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